You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
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