where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
being pregnant is like rehab
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize