yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
