....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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