I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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