This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
