problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
