am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Randomize
