You were right. It hurts to walk today.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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