tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
