Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
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