a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
