My brain says no but my pants say off.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Randomize
