why didn't you poke me back
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Randomize
