Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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