FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
Fuck appropriateness.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize