check it out our google latitudes are spooning
another moral hangover. fuck.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Randomize
