i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize