I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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