At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize