I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
