i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
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