Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(906): View more from Michigan

And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink

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(870): View more from Arkansas

Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!

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(408): View more from California

ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me

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(605): View more from South Dakota

remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(618): View more from Illinois

i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer

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(513): View more from Ohio

apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday

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(443): View more from Maryland

theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.

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(240): View more from Maryland

How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat

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(+61): View more from Australia

I need a hobby that isn't dick related

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