Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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