so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
