Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
I need moral support for this bender
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
