I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
