shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
