Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
