The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
he was CRYING into my vagina
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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