My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
This is the high leading the old right now
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
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