Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Randomize
