And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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