watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
