It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
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So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
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If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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