I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Randomize
