It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
