me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
