butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
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