Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
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