Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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