Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
