i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize