Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
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