so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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