Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
where does the pee come out of this thing
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Also, beer. Big fan.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
