but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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