Someone shit on the floor
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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