I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
