Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize